Adding “I Have Spoken” to Opinions Completely Negates All Counterarguments, Study Finds
Use this one simple phrase to immediately win all online arguments in the future. What could possibly go wrong?
Read moreCategory Archives: Star Wars
Darth Plague-Us May Just Be the Most Powerful Sith Lord Ever
Darth Sidious ended democracy and civil rights. Oh, and genocide, too. Darth Plagueis personally inconvenienced us. Who’s worse?
Read moreNew Federal Order Requires Mandalorian Helmets Be Worn in Public at All Times
When questioned about the rationale behind this extreme decision, CDC director Robert Redfield simply answered, “This is the way.”
Read moreMarvelous Movies’ Quick and Easy Guide to Star Wars Cannon: Comics Explained
The Star Wars universe is vast and confusing, so here we clearly explain what is and isn’t cannon in this faraway galaxy. We’re so helpful!
Read moreMarvelous Movies’ Guide for Announcing Lack of Interest in Star Wars
“Star Wars Week” has come to be dominated by two separate sects – “Star Wars” fans and People Who Announce They’ve Never Seen Star Wars.
Read moreIn Response to “Care” React, Facebook Announces New Reaction Buttons
New reactions include the long-awaited “I Understood That Reference” and “This Is The Way” buttons.
Read moreDarth Sidious Declares Himself True “Tiger King.”
Darth Sidious has been Maul-ing people to death since long before Carole Baskin was born.
Read moreDisney Donating Stormtrooper Helmets to COVID-19 Patients
Anyone who has been infected can rest assured that they will completely miss everyone else when they cough, sneeze, or even touch things.
Read moreMan Tries to Trick Wife into Watching “The DisneyPlus Show with the Cute Baby”
“No, it’s not a guy show. There’s, like, three female characters! And did I mention the cute baby?”
Read morePedro Pascal Conclusively Linked to Reviving Tired Franchises
Using the actor to revive a tired franchise–a move termed “Pascal’s Wager”–worked for Star Wars. Can it save the DCEU too?
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