BURBANK, CA–Dr. Bruce Banner, a.k.a. the Incredible Hulk, has reportedly been let go from future Marvel Studios installments after a number of his old movies suddenly resurfaced online.
The internet has been in an uproar about the content of some of the Hulk’s old movies, prompting Marvel Studios to terminate his contract. The offending movies in question include Hulk (2003) and The Incredible Hulk (2008), which have recently come under fire anew for such offenses as slow and boring exposition, confusing visual displays, lack of a compelling protagonist, and being too painful to watch for some viewers. Other sources have criticized movies from even earlier in the Hulk’s career, claiming that the Hulk portrayed fellow heroes Thor and Daredevil in an unfair and unflattering light.
The decision to let the Hulk go has met with largely negative reactions from the Marvel community. “Marvel already knew about the old movies when they first brought on the Hulk for good movies such as The Avengers,” explained Clint Barton, a.k.a. Hawkeye. “It’s not fair of them to punish him for something from the past that has been public knowledge for so long.”
“The Hulk isn’t the man he once was,” added USAF Lt. Col. James Rhodes, a.k.a. War Machine. “He wears clothes now, he’s grown much calmer overall, and he’s actually speaking in complete sentences these days. He isn’t the angry rage monster that those films make him out to be. He’s one of the kindest men I know, and he even restored the lives of millions of people in our last movie. Marvel is making a mistake here.”
At publishing time, Marvel Television had also fired Ghost Rider based on the embarrassing quality of his old movies from 2012 and earlier. Droves of outraged fans are calling for Marvel to similarly terminate its contract with the Fantastic Four.