Marvelous Movies’ Guide to Helping Your Teenager Through a Comic Books Faith Crisis

THE MULTIVERSE–We here at Marvelous Movies know that one day your teenagers will go rooting around in the attic or some long-forgotten bookshelf at your parents’ home and stumble upon your old comic books (“The Sacred Texts”)! Exposure to The Sacred Texts can prove a true Revelation to some, and it can be a Genesis for a real faith crisis in others. Obviously, we want all teenagers to navigate this experience and come out on the other side as true believers in truth, justice, and the Mighty Marvel way. So, here are our top five faith crisis landmines and ways to discuss them with your teens.

Peter Parker doesn’t look like himself from the movies.

Marvel Comics

Teenagers are often confused to find that comic books printed before 2016 often show a version of Peter Parker which does not look like Tom Holland, Tobey Maguire, or Andrew Garfield.

“It’s just so wrong,” long-time Marvelous Movies reader Jen Zee wrote us. “I mean, there is only one Spider-Man. I know he’s also been played by Tobey Maguire and Andrew Garfield, but that’s three Spider-Men in one. You can’t mess with that without being truly, deeply wrong.”

Ari An, another Marvelous Movies reader, argued, “No, there is only one Spider-Man. All the Peter Parkers are just various masks the one, true Spider-Man shows the world because the world can’t understand him.”

While the argument got heated, we here at Marvelous Movies were able to successfully Counsel the two of them to be Nice to each other.

20th Century Studios

The Bat Family Bams and Pows

There comes a moment in every young person’s life where they are confronted with an historical event so blatantly unjust or appalling that their faith is shaken to its core. The discovery of Batman‘s “Bam!” and “Pow!” graphics has been known to deeply shake the faith of young nerds. The best way to handle this moment is the same way society handles all regretful historical incidents: pretend they never happened and never speak of them again.

Marvel Comics

Captain America is a HYDRA Agent

This is a DEEPLY troubling realization. All the experts agree the best course of action is to yell “PSYCH!!!” very, very loudly.

DC Always seems to be in a Crisis

And they probably always will be. Just remind your teens that the multiplication of crises produces an irrational faith that Zach Snyder can come in and magically solve all the problems. Our advice is to blame Ezra Miller. And/or Joss Whedon?

Spider-Man Sold His Marriage to the Devil

Someone thought this was a good idea at some point. Also, people thought skinny jeans, feathered hair, and twerking were cool. People make mistakes, and succeeding generations mock them for it. It’s the circle of life.

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