NEW YORK, NY – In a LucasFilm panel at New York Comic Con this past weekend, company President Kathleen Kennedy revealed that fan favorite Salacious B. Crumb is making a return to the big screen in an undisclosed Star Wars film.
Crumb, the Kowakian monkey-lizard with a high-pitched, irritating laugh, was a break-out star from the court of Jabba the Hutt in Star Wars: The Return of the Jedi (1983). He was believed to have died offscreen in the destruction of Jabba’s royal yacht in that same movie. Now, it seems LucasFilm has decided to alter the film’s continuity, and we pray that they will alter it no further.
Kennedy further announced that Crumb’s feral, flea-bitten image has not tested well with modern audiences. “We needed to update his look,” Kennedy admitted, “without compromising his tendencies to spout gibberish and to break into an annoying, high-pitched laugh at random moments. So, we asked ourselves, who has these traits and appeals to modern audiences?” The answer, of course, turned out to be the muppet Elmo, whose popular 1996 toy, the Tickle Me Elmo, forever ingrained itself on the American psyche as having the most annoying laugh ever.
While not the worst creative decision LucasFilm has made in regards to its popular Star Wars series, this one is certain to prompt a strong fan response. Marvelous Movies will, as always, update our readers with the Salacious Crumbs of gossip as they B. come available.