“Dark Phoenix” to Rise Again, Reborn as “X-Men: Dark Phoenix”

Photo: Walt Disney Studios Motion Pictures

This summer’s Dark Phoenix film, released on June 7th as the latest installment of the X-Men franchise, will be reborn as X-Men: Dark Phoenix for the Blu-ray and DVD release on Tuesday, September 17th.

The film was originally scheduled for a November 2018 theatrical release, but after a few failed attempts to start the fire, Dark Phoenix finally flickered into theaters in June to an underwhelming reception. The film was so terrible that the studio tried not to broadcast that it was even part of the once-great X-Men franchise.

However, someone in the powers that be must have soon realized that leaving “X-Men” out of the name and not capitalizing on the franchise’s previous success was actually not a great business move. So, while the last glowing embers of this franchise may have died out, the film will rise again from the ashes as X-Men: Dark Phoenix for the home media release. This also makes it one of a small handful of known films bad enough that changing the title for the home media release seemed like a good marketing decision–right up there with Edge of Tomorrow/Live. Die. Repeat.

Sadly, the resurrected home media release X-Men: Dark Phoenix will not include improved features such as a clear and compelling antagonist, continuity consistent with the franchise, or a catchy musical number featuring Quicksilver. However, just like the character of Dark Phoenix in the comics and in previous franchise installment X-Men: The Last Stand (2006), this film is expected to kill the X-Men.

Unsurprisingly, despite Dark Phoenix‘s meager success, Marvel’s Dreaded Competition is still trying to steal ideas from their rivals by making their own version of Dark Phoenix. That is, they have actor Joaquin Phoenix playing a very Dark Character, so it’s clearly a rip-off of Marvel. The parallels between the two films are truly Uncanny!

Photos: Walt Disney Studios Motion Pictures and Warner Bros. Pictures

At publishing time, those Fox employees responsible for the Dark Phoenix fiasco have been…fired.

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