Dear Marvelous Movies,
I’m really pumped about the upcoming Obi-Wan Kenobi show. I’m a big fan of Star Wars, but I haven’t had the time to watch Star Wars Rebels. I don’t know much about the show’s villains, the Inquisitorius. Can you tell me what we can expect from them?
Great question! First things first, we noticed you said you are a big fan of Star Wars, but you have not watched Star Wars Rebels yet. That’s not actually a thing.
Oh! My bad! I’ll get right on that.
Good idea. The second thing is that nobody, and I do mean nobody, expects them.
Wait a minute, are you saying Obi-wan won’t be able to sense them coming?
No. It’s a rule. Nobody expects the Inquisitorius!
Wow. That’s an awesome power. What else can you tell me about them?
They wield fearsome weapons. Namely, fear, surprise, ruthless efficiency, almost fanatical devotion to the Emperor, and nice red lightsabers.
Nice! What do they do to Jedi they capture?
They tie the hapless victim to a comfy couch and torture him with pillows. Sometimes, they don’t let the victim leave until lunchtime or they retrieve a glass of cold milk from the fridge. Truly diabolical.
Comfy chair. Is that anything like the chair-thing Darth Vader used to torture Han Solo in Empire Strikes Back?
Yes, but the opposite.
Huh. Well, can’t wait to see it! Speaking of Vader, what can we expect from him in this series?
Well, we think it is fair to say Vader is never gonna give Obi-Wan up after he let him down. He’s running around the galaxy looking for Obi-Wan after his former master deserted him for a desert planet. Vader wants to make Obi-Wan cry before saying a final goodbye. That’s just how he rolls.