BURBANK, CA–With the upcoming release of Skeleton Crew, Disney’s highly anticipated Star Wars series, sources at Disney have revealed new plot details. Creator Jon Watts confirmed in a press release that the show will be “basically just Pirates of the Caribbean in space.”

“Disney doesn’t really do original ideas anymore,” Watts continued. “And what’s more, the fans’ reactions to things like The Last Jedi and The Acolyte show that they don’t really want original ideas anyway. They just want more of the same. So I figured, hey–let’s just take an existing Disney property and stick it in the Star Wars universe!”

“There’s already quite a few parallels between Star Wars and Pirates,” Watts went on to explain. “Like, you know the whole thing where the rough, amoral pirate dies at the end of the second movie but then his friends bring him back in the third movie? George Lucas totally stole that from Pirates.” Watts, best known for his work on the Tom Holland Spider-Man trilogy, is expected to bring new depth, weightiness, and gravitas to the Star Wars franchise that fans feel has been lacking.

The eight-episode season follows a crew of space pirates who live as immortal skeletons due to a Force-inflicted curse. Their quest to reverse the curse will take them across the galaxy and into contact with a notorious and absolutely fabulous pirate played by Johnny Depp! But as Dave Filoni is also a producer, the show is expected to feature surprise cameos from many familiar characters in the Star Wars galaxy, including the Mandalorian, Grogu, and a digitally de-aged Luke Skywalker.

Disney executives have confirmed their commitment to milking absolutely as much money as possible out of the franchise. Depp has signed on for at least five seasons, remaining on even after the rest of the original cast leaves and the thoroughly convoluted story no longer has any reason to continue. Disney has also announced that a Skeleton Crew ride will replace the longstanding Pirates of the Caribbean ride at Disney World’s Magic Kingdom.

At publishing time, a Disney employee had explained to Watts that “skeleton crew” is an idiomatic term and does not literally mean a ship’s crew composed of skeletons. “Oh. Yeah, I knew that,” Watts answered.

Star Wars: Skeleton Crew premieres tonight on DisneyPlus.