NEW YORK, NY–In its effort to appeal to a wide range of age groups, Marvel has announced a multi-part young adult book series featuring Harry Osborn from the Spider-Man movies. James Franco will act as creative consultant and will model the titular character for cover art. The highly anticipated series is expected to feature titles and adventures such as the following:
- Harry Osborn and the Sorcerer’s Stone. Harry meets Doctor Strange, wielder of the Time Stone, and timey-wimey antics ensue.
- Harry Osborn and the Chamber of Secrets. Harry discovers the truth about his father’s secret room. Featuring Kenneth Branagh, director of Thor.
- Harry Osborn and the Prisoner of Spider-Man. Surely it’ll have something to do with Spider-Man dangling this random guy precariously over the city streets.
- Harry Osborn and the Goblin of Fire. Do we really need to explain this one?
- Harry Osborn and the Order of the Phoenix. Harry meets Jean Grey, and probably also those random aliens who wanted to destroy her in Dark Phoenix.
- Harry Osborn and the Half-Blood Prince. Harry has a run-in with Loki, adopted frost giant prince of Asgard. Antics ensue.
The series will be written by J.K. Simmons, the internet’s favorite J.K. by far, and is expected to inspire at least ten blockbuster movies of progressively decreasing quality.