Iron Man Regrets Heroic Self-Sacrifice Now That Spider-Man Gone from MCU

Photos: Marvel Studios

THE AFTERLIFE– “I don’t think Tony would have done what he did, if he didn’t know you were going to be here after he was gone.” This was one of the most memorable lines of this summer’s hit blockbuster Spider-Man: Far from Home, spoken by mentor Happy Hogan to young superhero Peter Parker, a.k.a. Spider-Man. In light of this touching statement, we had a chance to interview the ghost of Tony Stark himself, a.k.a. Iron Man, the fallen hero of Avengers: Endgame, about Spider-Man’s subsequent removal from the MCU.

“What, they’re rebooting him again?” Stark commented once informed of the news about Spidey. “Seriously? How many times already has that kid lost a mentor? Granted, the last one was me, and I did kinda do that myself, but really, someone’s gotta start giving him a break.”

“Happy was right,” Stark continued. “I definitely was counting on the kid still being around. But in fairness, he had just been dead for the past five years, and alive again for all of maybe half an hour by the time I used the gauntlet. So, sure, maybe I should have thought that one through a little bit more. But it was somehow really important to me at the time to break away from that life-and-death fight long enough to transfer control of my whole EDITH system to the kid.”

“In fact, I didn’t even know for sure that using the gauntlet was gonna kill me,” Stark added. “There’s not really a manual for how these things work. I mean, I’ve got a wife and daughter to take care of, so I definitely would have thought twice if I had known. And there were plenty of people there–like Banner, Thor, or Carol–who I bet could have used the gauntlet and still been just fine afterward. Should’ve just let one of them do it.”

“I still just can’t believe the kid’s gone,” Stark lamented. “He was always my only choice to fill the void as the next Iron Man if anything were to happen to me. I mean, it’s not like I had a best friend who has been wearing a Stark suit since 2010, on top of being a decorated military hero, a legal adult, and still alive after the snap. Or even a badass wife who I just built a new suit for. It definitely had to be this nerdy new kid who I met like 3 times back when he was alive 5 years ago. I’m sure gonna miss him.”

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