DC Writers Reveal They’ve Secretly Been On Strike for Years and Nobody Noticed

Photos: Warner Bros. Entertainment; the CW

BURBANK, CA–The Writers Guild of America has been on strike since the beginning of May, potentially affecting many films and TV shows. But in a shocking announcement this weekend, DC Entertainment executives revealed the previously unrevealed news that their writers have actually been on strike for years.

Looking for more support for their cause, some of the writers and actors involved in the strike approached James Gunn, newly named head of DC Films. Gunn gave the following statement: “No, the good writers have been on strike for a while now, actually. We don’t really like to talk about it, but they filled me in when I first came on for The Suicide Squad. That’s why the first Suicide Squad movie–and, honestly, most of the DCEU–have been so terrible.”

Deeper research reveals that the DC writers’ strike began sometime after 2012, which marked Christopher Nolan’s last major DC project. “Nolan was probably our last good writer,” Gunn commented. “And once he was out, well, what incentive was there for everyone else to stay on board?”

“Marvel is much better, obviously,” Gunn added. “I mean, did you guys see Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3? What a perfect movie!”

Sources confirm that the DC writers’ strike has been responsible for the tedious melodrama of the Arrowverse, DC Comics getting rebooted every five years, and the infamous “MARTHA!” incident, among other unoriginal and lackluster plots.

“It is kind of weird that nobody’s really realized this was going on,” Gunn added. “But I guess DC fans are probably used to bad writing already, so they didn’t really notice a difference.”

DC writers say they plan to continue their protest until Ezra Miller is fired and Henry Cavill is reinstated as Superman.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s